Fear

 

This man is who I fear more than anyone or anything else since coming to Zambia. He is not mentally well. He has this obsession with following me wherever I go when we are at church. When we first got here, Bernard only attended one ward, now he attends both wards, back to back, the same as Hal and I. At first he wanted to sit right next to me but that was put to a halt the first day, thank goodness! I always make sure I sit right next to the wall and Hal sits right next to me when we are in Sunday School or when I go to Relief Society I make sure there are sisters sitting on both sides of me if I can’t sit next to the wall.

Also, it is fortunate that I play the piano every Sunday. However, it is nerve racking because he is always staring at me. Sometimes he will move benches so I am in direct line of his vision.

One Sunday, he came into Relief Society. I immediately got up and walked out a different door!

Hal seems to be the only member of the ward who can get him to do anything. One Sunday, Bernard got up to bear his testimony in Testimony meeting. He always holds his Book of Mormon. He went on and on, but of course it is mostly jumbled talk except, “come back.”  A member of the bishopric tried to get him to sit down but he wouldn’t. He only left the pulpit when Hal went up to him, put his arm around him, and told him that other’s needed to bear their testimonies and he needed to come and sit down.

On another Sunday, he hurried to the Sacrament table in the middle of the meeting and lifted the cloths and started to grab handfuls of bread off the trays. Most everyone was too shocked and had no idea what to do.

Just a couple of weeks ago Bernard somehow got into the church yard which is fenced and gated. A girl was also inside the yard. About the time the Bishopric arrived and also the Assistants to the Mission President, this girl had done something to aggravate Bernard. He frantically searched for a rock and hurled it at the girl! Fortunately the aim was off and missed hitting her!  The Bishop had to forcefully hold Bernard back!

We later learned that he can jump the fence! Other buildings in Lusaka have guards. I don’t know why this building does not.

No one knows what to do. He is not mentally stable and no one’s knows when he might lash out. There has been talk of putting him in a mental institution but no progress towards that has been done. He has family living about five hours away. No knows if they would take him. 

This is really sad because  I love hearing the people speak and bear their testimonies! So Sundays have become a real challenge to both Hal and I.